I'm a Worrier, Like My Mother Before Me.

I just emailed my mom two documents.  One is a one-page guide to Emily's schedule, medication dosages, and food requirements, along with a note about tantrums.  The other is a list of foods that she likes to eat.  I also sent a second email with details about her doctor.

Does my sending this to my mother indicate a lack of confidence in her ability to care for my daughter?  No. 

Does it reflect my reluctance to leave my daughter and my guilt about doing so?  Probably.

Mostly, though, I know my mom.  She's a worrier.  She's a planner.  A list maker.  A scheduler. 

I provided this document as a cheat sheet to the things I have learned about my daughter and the tools and tricks I use to keep her happy.

It is my firm belief that if a parent anticipates their child's needs, behaviors, and wants, they can mitigate most bad behavior.  Not all, certainly, as Emmy's daily tantrums can attest, but I think that a parent planning ahead is the difference between a normal happy child (who occasionally gets frustrated by normal child things) and a maladjusted, cranky, tired, unhappy child.

If your child gets enough sleep, they are less likely to spiral when they get frustrated (and with limited communication skills, frustration is inevitable).

So, for my mom, I wrote down what Emmy's schedule is, and what she expects throughout the day so that her schedule will change as little as possible.  I can't tell my mom everything that I know, and from a logical standpoint, I understand that, but my hope is that writing some of it down will help.

I think, mostly, though, this is just evidence of how much like my mother I am.  If you plan and think about it enough, things won't go wrong.  But like I told mom, babies are just a big ball of chaos, and though planning certainly helps, helicopter (grand)parenting will just lead to anxious children (and lots of gray hair).